12 anti-Trump things to do today if you just tryna chill~

“What are your Inauguration plans?” Living in DC, the new home of our president-elect, this question is harder to avoid than most things.

I have been trying to come to terms with this election ever since Trump unexpectedly became relevant in the midst of it all. For a while, his campaign felt like a trainwreck (it still sort of is?), that was still moving, but would eventually come to a screeching halt.

Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case.

I try not to meddle in political conversations with people because for me, it’s not just about politics.

Anyways. I was pondering the idea of attending Inauguration today as it is a historical day for America and regardless of who gets elected into office and living in DC through it all has been a pretty cool experience. You’re exposed to all different types of protests, point of views, and political discussions which feels much more real here, I guess.

I decided against participating today. Not because of road closures, metro shutdowns, or crowds. Not because I don’t want to be accepting of what is to come, or because I’m rebelling and hashtagging #NotMyPresident. I’m not delusional to the reality of this despite my heightened anxiety about what the country could/has turned into.

I just genuinely don’t want to go. I don’t want to fan girl in the crowd. I don’t want to protest down K St.

The “coolness” or “historical” part of the experience doesn’t seem to appeal to me. Why? Because I don’t want to celebrate Trump today. I don’t want to be surrounded by people with whom I share very little in common with. I don’t want to feel anxious, claustrophobic, or angry today.

I hate comparing it to something so trivial, but it would be like attending a crowded, sweaty, alcohol-induced frat party at the age of (almost) 24. Like. No.

Anyways, I decided to compile a list of things to do today if you simply aren’t interested in protesting or supporting. If you just tryna chill~, but still not be in support of Trump, I think you’ve come to the right place. Enjoy this list compiled by a friend and I.

  1. Drink beer that is not Yuengling. Get trashed and make out with a person in Nasty Woman shirt.
  2. That being said, pick up all of the Yuengling cans you find on the ground today and recycle them. Be hopeful this aluminum you just recycled will be used to create something more enjoyable, like Dove chocolate wrappers.
  3. Support a local business with your bestie who both support the same ideals you do. s/o to Pleasant Pops and Annie B!
  4. Preform a wine fueled seance with your lady friends to summon vengeful lady spirits to occupy the White House and Capitol building.
  5. Share an Obama and Biden meme on Facebook. Or 10.
  6. High five a peaceful protester, even if you don’t want to protest. High fives are fun.
  7. Donate to Planned Parenthood. Or just toss me some hunninds to pay for my birth control. Either or. (Joking. Donate to PP.)
  8. Go to the gym. You’ll need to be physically fit enough to survive the first Purge since most of us are too old for the Hunger Games.
  9. Rewrite Harry Potter and replace every instance of “Voldemort” with “Trump” and attempt to figure out where his horcruxes are for a fun scavenger hunt (his hair, a cytogenetically frozen trump steak in a vault somewhere, Barron).
  10. Write an apology letter to Lady Liberty because most of the Founding Fathers were kind of assholes too and they don’t deserve our tears.
  11. Begin making preliminary plans to take that tropical vacation that you’ve always wanted! Only the purpose is to finish what Ponce de Leon started and find that Fountain of Youth because we need Biden or Bernie to run in 2020.
  12. Brainstorm of ways to explain this your unborn children.

Hope to see y’all at the Women’s March tomorrow. Turn UP.

 

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